In the ring is a phrase I've been using for years, mostly on tape, talking to myself. I never sat down to define it in one place, and honestly I think that's part of what it is, cause the definition I keep giving shifts a little depending on where I'm standing when I say it. But people I care about have started asking what I mean by it, so this page is me writing some of it out, in my own words, from the recordings where I first said them.
The definition I have for it is this. You're tired of living a hypocritical, double-minded lifestyle, especially the one where you gaslight other people for attempting to live. Stepping in the ring is what happens when you're done with that version of yourself, and I've said it plainly on tape more than once: step in the ring means step in the ring, stop saying I'm not strong enough.
There's a second way I say it, and it carries as much weight for me as the first one. In the ring means being in contract with the nothing, to be guaranteed it has your best interest and that you'll never ultimately fall. It's like adoption. Christians say "in Christ," and that world is too messed up for me to want to use that term, so this is the one I use instead.
There's no membership test here, and I'm not handing out a title. The heart is the indicator of being in the ring, not the sin you're doing. Your guilt, your conscience testifies to it. The heart that's in the ring is always testing, not assuming, trying its best. So it was never about being perfect. For the one in the ring it's okay to be human, okay to be imperfect. What you're giving up is something else, cause when you're in the ring you're kind of giving your life, giving your consent to be protected by whatever means, and allowing your ego to die as you go in.
And what I've found on the other side of that is a very supported life. Situations might not look great in the moment, but in hindsight you were covered. I hold my own file this way too, the diagnoses and the bankruptcy and all of it, and from inside the ring it reads like yeah, but that's not a problem, you're gonna make it out.
I'll say the honest part too. I've gone back and forth about whether any of this is good to be broadcasted to the general public, because of the whole in-the-ring thing and who are the people who have pure hearts. So this page isn't me selling you a doorway, and some of it can't be handed over in words anyway. You can't put this into words, you just have to step in the ring to get it. I'm still in the middle of it myself, and I'm sure there's more of it I haven't understood yet.