The Abraham Studio · The Living Portal • one of six rooms
Ordinary dignity, money constraint, home friction, pleasure, immigrant pride, “start where you are” in matter. A lived scene, not motivational performance.
from this room
14 films
L01
It's not just your dishes that aren't done… You are intelligent even though you forget and you judge yourself… We are Superman, but we're not Superman.
That's me on tape from May, teaching the systems I run my own home on. Dish rack, boxes, anything that takes the pressure off the head. The intelligence is real and the forgotten dishes are real. The film for this page will show one system that holds both.
L02
it is very much worth having wasted money energy time wasted becoming the person you are now… Team Abe camp guilt is not cool
That's me about the courses I didn't finish and the things I paid for and put down. This lesson picks one of them up and looks at it straight. Not to call the purchase wise, and not to burn it either. It fed the person talking to you.
L03
Should I pay for milk and yoghurt or try a government support program. Am i being foolish?
I typed that in a grocery aisle. And on a call about my EI claim, this: I don't want people to think like, you know, I'm faking it or I'm trying to be lazy.
This lesson doesn't end with a trick that makes either sentence go away. No hustle shame, no manifestation talk, no rescue arc. Just a real low-money decision the way it happens, with the dignity left in.
LW04
I always say this when people tell me to suffer temporarily and grind and then finally relax. I feel like that's committing a crime again x timeline me to benefit future y timeline me. I am not about sacrifice… I'd rather move as slow as a turtle taking care of Abe today than fast track through sacrifice.
One scope note, because the word sacrifice is doing specific work there. For people I love, sacrifice is a role I play on purpose. What I won't do is spend the me that exists today to buy a me that doesn't exist yet. That's the pace this whole room moves at.
LW06
it's so worth it to feel alive even if everything else gets slammed to the back
That's me about the ADHD rabbit holes. I know what the productivity world does with a sentence like that. No fix follows here. The other sentence that belongs beside it, also mine: I'm so comfortable in my skin.
L04
last time when I said I would feel miserable to be someone else when I saw in Ethiopia someone in a car driving like a young guy I was like I can't fit in there like it would really suck to be someone else
That's the pride half, and it's the only half in here. No hardship arc, nothing about what leaving cost. Just a second on a street in Ethiopia and what I noticed in myself.
L05
a bunch of movies in 2025 end carousel and notes about them per comment line or in Individual posts or through a video carousel at the end like - Sophie twin, andor this, Loki this, or even journal style. I think I can sacrifice this week for a 2025 review it’ll be worth it documenting posting and journaling.
That's the whole note, written to myself in December. The shorthand is mine and I'm the only one who knows what half of it means. This lesson is the year-review I planned for myself there, in whichever of those shapes it ends up taking.
L06
My life has been out of control. I haven't been making food. I've been using my last dollars continually to buy food. I know how to fix it. Help me fix it.
That's January, said to a camera before I'd done anything about it. Nothing follows it here. No fix, no system, no after. It's the part before there was a decision worth being proud of.
L07
HOw my growth spurts give me the most unprodcutive days but how that is giving me a muscle tear so im super man since that moment even gthough i m shit the next days in some peoples eyes.
Typed fast, kept as typed. The claim is present tense on purpose: superman since that moment, not eventually. The days after are still the days after. I wrote both parts down without picking one.
L08
I felt so guilty because I've been allocating a a lot of my time focusing on ... courses and all that stuff
is this like a one two three four five six week sacrifice where you have to be super focused to like you know see the success you want and then you will be able to pull back focus on the other parts of your life or is this like literally be my life
I recorded that in February and I didn't answer it. It's still not answered. The question is whether the heavy stretch is a sprint you pull back from or just the shape of the life now, and I'd rather leave it standing than pretend I settled it.
L09
Realized yesterday the reason my house is messy is more so guilt than time. Yeah i dont have time but that’s cause im too guilty to invest the time in me, the present me, although cleaning if for future me too.
Typos kept. There's no fix at the end of that note because there wasn't one. I noticed the guilt and I noticed the counter-thought in the same breath, and I wrote both down. That's the whole thing.
L10
like i am right now but that doesn't make them better than you in any way it's just different experiences we're all having and it's not based on you know merit like if you believe in karma that way that can be a tiny way to look at it for some scenarios but yeah I'm not trying to romanticize poverty or others other things but you know despite what the manifesting community wants to tell you I'm just out here trying to share this other perspective
I recorded that in July while delivering groceries in a rich neighbourhood, answering a question I'd asked myself out loud a minute earlier. The karma line stays hedged the way I hedged it. Both guards were already in the tape.
L11
You don't even account for the cost of coming back. Like, once you do get money, you have been dysregulated.
One sentence, said in March, never said again. It's about my own experience of being broke and not about anybody else's. There's no tip after it and there isn't going to be.
L12
maybe this is just for me there was also a nice nuanced part there where I was like this is for Abraham. There's a difference between saying that and when I said this maybe this is for me because when I say Abraham it makes it more real
Four months later, different words, same thing: i'm not doing it for people i'm just doing it as me.
It's the smallest thing in this room. Saying my own name is not the same as saying me, and I only noticed because I said both out loud in the same minute.
where to go next
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